Welcome to TruthTalkLive.com!

Today’s Issues, From a Biblical Perspective!

Passionate Housewives Desperate for God

Posted by truthtalklive on December 13, 2007

How can we recover the Biblical role of women?

Today’s guest is one of the authors of “Passionate Housewives Desperate for God” Their blog can be accessed here www.passionatehousewives.blogspot.com or www.ladiesagainstfeminism.com

Advertisements

13 Responses to “Passionate Housewives Desperate for God”

  1. Laura said

    Although I am a wife and mother who DOES work outside the home, I totally support those women who are able to stay at home and raise their kids. I think it is biblical, and it is my heart’s desire to stay at home as well. However, at this time in the life of my family, I am unable to do so due to finances. I honestly don’t know if I’ll ever be able to stay at home full-time–unless my husband’s income increases significantly (he is an associate pastor and teaches Christian school full-time)while I teach at a Christian college. I do take offense to those who imply that it is a sin for a wife and mother to work outside of the home at all–there are many of us who work outside of the home not because we selfishly WANT to, but because we HAVE to so that our families can eat. It IS a sin for me, however, to constantly covet staying at home when God has not made a provision for me to do so at this time. I actually had to turn TruthTalk Live off and pray about my situation because of my covetous heart.

  2. Jennie Chancey said

    Thanks for having me on today, Stu! I really appreciated the opportunity to share my heart. I wish I’d had more time to talk with Camille, who called in about the African-American community, but I’ll seek to drop her a line and continue that conversation elsewhere.

    For Laura, who posted above, I totally understand where you are coming from, and I think the sin is squarely on the shoulders of the Church and the culture. In many ways, Western Culture (Christian culture) has been carried off to Babylon. We find ourselves slaves to a culture hostile to what the Bible teaches. That so many women are forced to work today is a tragedy and shows the failure of the Church to actually do what Scripture commands fathers, husbands, and families to do. I actually wrote about this in the book, and I’ll quote a bit of that here:

    Now don’t think I’m encouraging you to wish for a fairy-tale ending to your story. This is not about lightly dismissing real difficulties with a call to stop worrying. You may still worry; I’m simply urging you to give that anxiety and stress over to the Lord and trust Him to move in His time. He is ‘able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think’ (Ephesians 3:20), but there are also times He wishes to sanctify us through difficulties. I often think of the Israelites who lived in captivity for generations. The temple had been destroyed; they could not go to Jerusalem to offer the sacrifices God had commanded them to give; they lived under a pagan government and no longer enjoyed the freedom of God’s perfect law in a land of their own.
    But instead of despairing and giving up hope, they submitted to God’s yoke and continued to teach their children about the Lord’s ways. God even commanded them to thrive in captivity, saying, ‘Build ye houses, and dwell in them; and plant gardens, and eat the fruit of them… And seek the peace of the city whither I have caused you to be carried away captives, and pray unto the LORD for it: for in the peace thereof shall ye have peace’ (Jeremiah 29:5, 7). We can bear fruit and have peace even in seasons of ‘captivity.’ Give your situation over to the Lord, and do your best to submit to and honor your husband in difficulty. Know that the prayers of other women are with you. I’ve heard many working women say that they feel condemned by their sisters in Christ. I’ve never met a homemaker who made catty remarks about or felt superior to a sister in the workforce. I suppose those women might exist, but Stacy and I aren’t two of them! We’ve experienced the chastening hand of the Lord in our lives, too, and we are thankful that He doesn’t ask us to be perfect before He will consent to use us. He takes us where we are and continually molds us into His image, promising to finish the work He has begun in us (Philippians 1:6).

    Does God command women to keep the home (Titus 2)? Yes. He also commands us to tithe, to be modest, to demonstrate hospitality, and a whole list of other things. Do we break these commands? Yes! Not one of us is pure. Not one of us is perfect. God is sanctifying us and working through us even when we do not perfectly obey Him! Instead of condemning those who are in sin, we need to strive to remove the logs from our own eyes and pray continually for the Lord to reform His Church so that we can once again be a shining light to the world. I would love to see a revival of the Christian family so that the world actually sits up and notices the difference. Today, the divorce rate in the Church is virtually the same as the divorce rate outside of the Church. What hope do we hold out to the world? The rate of premarital sexual activity in the Church is nearly identical to that in the world. Where can young people turn for hope in a world ravaged by STDs and the emotional devastation wrought by the “hook-up” culture? They aren’t going to look at the Church if we don’t start obeying the Word and showing that God’s ways work! One family at a time, we can bring about revival and reformation, but it won’t be easy or take place overnight. It’s something we’ve got to work for over the long haul.

    Dear sister, you have my prayers! I pray for all my sisters in Christ who find themselves outside the home looking in. I pray the Lord will open a way for them to return home and demonstrate to the world the power of the Christian homemaker. God is faithful! Let’s pray for Him to continue to open our eyes to what our culture considers “gotta haves” when we can really do without them. Let’s start asking ourselves what we’re willing to give up in order to live biblically. This goes for me, too! All of us have baggage that we’ve taken on as a result of listening to ear-tickling instead of trusting the Lord. But God has promised to be faithful and to sanctify us, completing the work He began in us. It’s a long race, but He will equip us to complete it!

    Blessings in Christ,
    Jennie

  3. WifeKeeper said

    Also, if Christians in America would seek to live on less than they make, more mother’s could go back home. http://www.DaveRamsey.com

    For a mom to go home is a sacrifice that is well worth it.

    Wanna go home? Get on a budget, downsize, cut costs, don’t keep up with the Jones’. Get out of debt and stay out. We as American christians have no excuse except materialism.

    Also, to our black sisters. Keep your head up. Pray for “white” godly/Biblical men to be raised up for such a time as this to evangelize, mentor and disciple the young black men who have no examples in their lives of what a man is, much less a father.

    MOst white mothers work because of desire for something better/selfishness. Most black mothers work because of necessity/basic needs.

    My o my how the church has dropped the ball. Thank God for those mothers who have chosen and sacrificed so they could stay home. Thank God for those mothers who desire to stay home and may He make it possible.

    – WifeKeeper

  4. John said

    The hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world.

  5. Laura said

    Dear Jennie–thanks so much for your encouragement. I really appreciate your prayer!
    To Wifekeeper–My family already does Dave Ramsey.

  6. Fred said

    Re: post #3

    I found some of WifeKeeper’s remarks rather distasteful. I hope I am not alone.

  7. Moderator said

    We don’t delete comments unless profanity or obscenity is used. Also, we will delete if a personal threat or threat of attack is made. We review every comment and make the decisions as to whether or not a comment should be delete. Comment #3 in this thread doesn’t cross the line. Thank you – Moderator

  8. Mike Sears said

    I agree Fred. The “black/white” comments were completely unnecessary.

  9. Mike Sears said

    Moderator
    While I agree with Fred that they were distasteful, they did not merit censorship either.

  10. Brad said

    Although I am a wife and mother who DOES work outside the home, I totally support those women who are able to stay at home and raise their kids. I think it is biblical, and it is my heart’s desire to stay at home as well. However, at this time in the life of my family, I am unable to do so due to finances. I honestly don’t know if I’ll ever be able to stay at home full-time–unless my husband’s income increases significantly (he is an associate pastor and teaches Christian school full-time)while I teach at a Christian college. I do take offense to those who imply that it is a sin for a wife and mother to work outside of the home at all–there are many of us who work outside of the home not because we selfishly WANT to, but because we HAVE to so that our families can eat. It IS a sin for me, however, to constantly covet staying at home when God has not made a provision for me to do so at this time. I actually had to turn TruthTalk Live off and pray about my situation because of my covetous heart.

    Laura, I just want to encourage you. My wife and I were in the same situation you are facing now. We had prayed for 10 years to God for Him to allow my wife to stay home. We have 4 kids now, and had 2-3 for most of my wife’s working (outside the home) life. I know it is difficult, especially when your desire is to be home, but press on, and never lose faith that God has heard your prayers. For us, it wasn’t about being materialistic (I’ll address the CRAP from Wifekeeper later in this post), but about numerous financial mistakes we had made very early on in marriage, and poor life decisions that had caught up to us, and it simply took some time to work through them. However, during that time, we learned to appreciate just how truly wonderful it is for the wife to be able to stay at home, and God accomplished many things with my wife at her workplace (being able to witness and mentor others, among many things). So, God definitely had a reason, and when HIS time was perfect, He cleared the way for her to stay home. We now have a 4th child, one that will never know a daycare, and we are thankful for that. Keep praying, and keep believing, knowing that God DOES hear you, and that you only need to trust in Him to provide what He knows you need. Ignore anything else you hear to the contrary, and ignore any thoughts that Satan might plant that say otherwise.

    As to Wifekeeper’s remarks:

    Also, if Christians in America would seek to live on less than they make, more mother’s could go back home. http://www.DaveRamsey.com

    Unless you’ve personally interviewed EVERY family where the mother works outside the home, and completely understand their situation, this is NOT a general statement you are qualified to make. Are his principals in general a good idea? Yes. But implementing them, DEPENDING ON EACH FAMILY’S INDIVIDUAL SITUATION, are different across the board. So be careful not to generalize.

    For a mom to go home is a sacrifice that is well worth it.

    This I agree with.

    Wanna go home? Get on a budget, downsize, cut costs, don’t keep up with the Jones’. Get out of debt and stay out. We as American christians have no excuse except materialism.

    See my rebuttal to your 1st comment. Entirely depends on the situation, and takes time, and doesn’t happen instantly. And honestly, God has different purposes for everyone, and uses people in His way for His purposes. We shouldn’t overlook that, either.

    Also, to our black sisters. Keep your head up. Pray for “white” godly/Biblical men to be raised up for such a time as this to evangelize, mentor and disciple the young black men who have no examples in their lives of what a man is, much less a father.

    Here’s where you start coming out of left field. “Black” or “white” has NOTHING to do with it. Men need mentoring, but “black” men don’t specifically need it from “white” men, any more than “white” men need it from “black” men. Color doesn’t matter AT ALL in what we’re talking about. Each person is individually responsible for their life, and answers for their life to God, and won’t be able to use any excuse when they do so, such as “I never had a chance.” This was unnecessary, and should have been left out of anything you said.

    MOst white mothers work because of desire for something better/selfishness. Most black mothers work because of necessity/basic needs.

    This ticks me off. What a horribly general, completely unfounded statement. False at best, prejudicial at worst. The “poor, black helpless mother” comments won’t work here, b/c there are also “poor, white helpless mothers” as well. And the “selfish, materialistic white mother” comment also doesn’t work, b/c there are “selfish, materialistic black mothers” as well. This was utterly ridiculous, and gives us a lot of insight into the basis for much of your comments. I’m sure when you typed them you thought they sounded great, but not so. You really ought to apologize to the many people I’m sure you offended, including Laura.

    My o my how the church has dropped the ball. Thank God for those mothers who have chosen and sacrificed so they could stay home. Thank God for those mothers who desire to stay home and may He make it possible.

    Thank God for ALL mothers. Thank God for those who stay at home and raise their kids, keep up with the house, and are great help, love and support for their husbands. Thank God for those mothers who go to work, sad b/c they left a child with a cold at the daycare, their heart aching as they drive away, praying to God that He will provide a way to stay home, wishing that they never would have made the financial mistakes they did. Thank God for those single mothers who have to work, b/c they may not have chosen that situation, yet they still have pride and want the best for their kids.

    Let’s not place one group above another, or assume WHY a mother is in the situation she’s in.

  11. WifeKeeper said

    To all,

    My intention was never to offend any one.

    But Scripturally – does God want Christian mothers at home or in the workplace? God can work in any situation, but what is His plan for Christian mothers? Is it to send the kids to daycare while mom works?

    I don’t think so. That being said, it should be every Christian mothers goal to eventually be a stay-at-home mother. Getting out of debt is one of the first steps in the process. Cutting lifestyle back is another step. Whether we like to admit it or not, the Church in America, for the most part, has fallen ill with stuffitis.

    Single mothers are a different situation – especially if it is because of divorce or a dead beat dad. This is where the church as a whole has failed. We have failed to teach the Biblical roles of father and mother. We have failed to come along side of the widows and downtrodden. Yes, a general statement concerning the church as a whole.

    Now, to the black/white issue. Statistics show that it is young black men and women that are in more need than whites of the same age bracket. Most black kids will grow up in a single parent home – usually either mom or grandma. Our prison system is predominantly black. Most black men get their upbringing from BET and rap music. They need godly men to reach out to them.

    Maybe we could start another topic on segregation in the church – example; the 2 baptist churches on the same street. 1 for black and 1 for white, yes in 2007. We have some work to do: http://www.OneHumanRace.com

    I work daily in low income/poverty stricken areas. These areas are 95% black. Churches on each corner of the housing authorities and yet very few if any are making an impact. What will it take for us to see that there is a division still in America, even in the Church.

    And I am a “white” American who grew up in the trailer park with both parents working. They struggled financially – bankruptcy, late notices, etc. So don’t assume I have no experience. My wife and I struggled. And we decided it was Biblical and best for her to stay home and me to work. We also made it priority to live off what I brought home. We have changed our legacy through trial and error, perseverance and the grace of God.

    Again, if I offended anyone, I apologize. that was not my intention. But I can speak from personal experience. I would suggest that if you think there is no difference in white/black situations, go to the poor side of your city and see what it is like. You may get a rude awakening. See the baby on the porch crying. See mom yelling at the baby. And don’t see daddy anywhere around.

    Then open your Bible and read “Let the older women teach the younger women….” or “Fathers teach your children….”

    – WifeKeeper

    PS, Brad the reason I said white men teach black men is because the black community is lacking in Biblical role models. Is that a racist remark? I live in the south and see daily the failure that has occured in the black community. Al, Jesse, Creflo, etc. have not been a blessing to them one bit. You took offense because I made a distinction between black/white. They reason why I did this was in regard to the caller who was “african american” who surely understands what I was saying. It is a sad fact but we are not colorblind as Christians, even though we should be. White mothers, for the most part, do not start off in the same struggle that black mothers do. General statement but statistically accurate.

  12. Moderator said

    Again, please be advised that we will delete any comment that contains profanity, obscenity or links to sites we deem unfit for truthtalklive.com. We will also delete a comment if a personal threat or threat of attack is made. Call it censorship if you want. This forum will be kept clean of such language & comments of that nature.

  13. kandace said

    Although I am a single person by choice therefore some people would maintain I have no right to speak to this topic, I feel that as a Christian woman I must speak to the issue.

    I hear the Titus woman mentioned as the requirement in order to be obedient to God. Yet, do not forget the Proverbs 31 woman who included her work as part of her role as mother.

    Nobody ever demeans a man for giving his time to the office, sometimes to the extreme and then expecting his wife to do EVERYTHING around the house. I thought marriage was a partnership. Having said that, the decision for a married couple to have children in the first place is one that must be bathed in prayer. Many men want children but are totally clueless on the time requirements to raising them, and the financial requirements to do so. They expect the intimacy of marriage (I cannot describe this further without going beyond the bounds of common decency but I’m sure the mothers understand where I am going). In this culture which is obsessed with sex, there is no wonder that this situation is occurring.

    The Biblical model assumes that there are other people involved to assist in the rearing of children: i.e. single women who have either not found God’s man to marry or (like me) have felt that God’s will was to remain single – I Cor. 7 model. Not every person is to marry and have children of their own but every person is to be involved in some way to encourage those with children.

    I have recently – praise God – found an example of a family in which both parents work outside the home but include their children in the planning of family details so that the children are not neglected but feel such a part of God’s family that all the children have continued their parent’s example in full-time Christian ministry.

    Working outside the home these days is almost a requirement not just for financial reasons but for future family security. What would happen if something happens to the husband – the main breadwinner in most families? If the wife has kept contact with the marketplace in some fashion, there is financial provision for the children. Traditional life insurance is too expensive for many families to afford.

    Yes, we place our faith in God to provide yet He expects us to use some common sense as well.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

 
%d bloggers like this: